Hello, my name is Lorie Givens, and I am the author of “The Do-It-Yourself Guide to Conscious Living”. If you’ve already read it, you know that I provide some insight into my life at the very end of the book in the section labeled, “Some Things about Me”. You also know it reads less like a resume and more like a conversation with an old friend. I wrote it that way so that I could focus less on the things I had done and more on the person I had become. See, I went from a longstanding and prosperous career in the financial services sector to an unexpected hollowness of sorts when I walked away from it a few years ago. Of course, I wasn’t aware of it at the time, but who I was or, at least, how I identified myself was mostly characterized by what I did for a living. So when I removed that from my life, I was left kind of not really knowing who I was.
When that happens, you can either become somewhat lost, which I did, or you can become something more, which I also did because, in the process of deciding to and then writing this book, I discovered that what any of us becomes is mostly the result of how we see ourselves. That’s one of the reasons I wrote it, but I was also searching for advice from a trusted source, and since I’ve always believed the most important people we can trust in life are ourselves, I wanted that source to be me. In other words, I wanted to figure it out on my own and not burden anyone else or, even worse, expose what was happening inside me.
So I kind of disconnected from things and people and spent a lot of time in my head trying to sort things out. I figured if I could make myself believe that it wasn’t advice I was getting from myself, especially the ugly kind that feels more like shame or guilt, then maybe, it would be easier for me to follow.
(That’s when I knew I was on to something.)
If I could convey what I was discovering in such a way that it didn’t feel like advice, then it would feel like something I could fix on my own, and if it could feel that way for me, it could for anyone. (Hence, the DIY revelation.) In other words, if I could become more self-aware without it feeling like a chore, a trap, an expectation, or even, an obligation, then maybe other people could, too, and if we all did it at the same time, we could finally realize, possibly even appreciate, how much alike we are. We’ve just forgotten our similarities because we’ve been so focused on our differences, and that’s because, unknowingly, we’ve been so focused… on ourselves.
See, all our lives we’ve been taught that the key to figuring out what was “wrong” or even, “right” with us was to focus on the ways we were different, possibly even, unique, but the key really lies in focusing on how we are the same. If we really want to understand ourselves, we must redirect that inward focus, the one that keeps us listening to our inner voices, outward in order to see that everyone else is doing the same.
And that’s how I learned to get out of my head. It’s how you can, too.
I can assure you that “The Do-It-Yourself Guide to Conscious Living” is not about me or my mostly unremarkable life story. Instead, it’s about how remarkable our stories look when we line them up alongside each other and see how much we have in common when it comes to looking at ourselves.
Trust me. You’ll think differently when you’re done.?